Years back I went shopping for the perfect Valentine’s Day gift for my then high school sweetheart. When I arrived at the local branch of a national card and gift retailer, I zeroed in on two teddy bears who “kissed” when you put them in front of each other.
I went to the cashier with two male versions of the bears, who instructed me that they were only sold as a set of opposite sex bears. I asked to speak with the manager, since it did not say “heterosexual pairings only” on any of the promotional signs and they happened to have an extra two male bears (perhaps a local lesbian had been there before). The manager remained steadfast with her decision to not sell two male bears together.
I even offered to buy two sets of opposite sex bears when the manager informed me that not only do they not sell the male bears without their female counterparts, but that the magnets inside the two male bears would cause them to REPEL one another- which was far from the message I wanted to be sending my Valentine.
For the purposes of this blog post, I started shopping this year for an imaginary valentine – hoping that retailers would have more of a diverse product offering today. The result of an internet search on “Valentine’s Day Gifts for Gay Men” produced general V-Day gift sites that sold chocolates, flowers, and other non-gender specific merchandise.
Some gay e-commerce sites have special gift baskets and sales on adult products and rainbow teddy bears. OutGreetings offers gay themed e-cards. However, no national brands jumped out as capitalizing on the gay dollar around the holiday.
I tried a second search for “gay teddy bears” (somewhat scared of what might pop up) and found that the Vermont Teddy Bear Company is the place to go for gay and lesbian stuffed animal collectors. They have a variety of Gay Pride Teddy Bears that are perfect for your gay or lesbian sweetheart, including a same-sex couple (male couple or female couple) that they market as “the perfect wedding, civil union or anniversary gift.”
Each year we hear heterosexual friends complain about how commercial Valentine’s Day has become, but why aren’t we seeing this marketing strategy in the gay community? We’re spenders, gift givers, and according to the Community Marketing Inc. 2007 Gay Consumer Index, 46% of gay men and 65% of lesbians are partnered or live with a significant other. That’s a goldmine for companies who sell specialty V-Day merchandise.
Given the choice, I’d rather buy a gay specific greeting card and gift vs. a generic card or a gender-neutral box of chocolates, picture frame, or candle. It’s unlikely, but one day it would be nice to walk into any shopping mall and find a selection of gifts that are aimed directly at me- a gay consumer. With an estimated median household income of $83,000 among gay male couples and $80,000 among lesbian couples according to CMI, retailers should be welcoming us as consumers and not repelling us.
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