As a Northern transplant, I’ve found myself pleasantly surprised, personally and professionally, by the city of Raleigh. While I had expected the hot weather and oh-so-charming accents, I was unprepared for how socially liberal and progressive the city is, especially regarding the city’s LGBT residents. Many states in the South, North Carolina included, still have NO state-level protection for LGBT employees. Southern states’ hate crimes laws also remain uninclusive of sexual orientation or gender identify.

As regular readers of this blog, we know that LGBTs are often victims of verbal and physical harassment and discrimination and we all know how important it is to have a safe, supportive outlet (be it a physical place or a person to talk with) for overwhelming or unmanageable times. And one of Raleigh’s most glaring problems was that this diverse city didn’t have an official community gathering place for its LGBT citizens.

Thankfully, Raleigh will be opening its very own LGBT Center this Friday, May 7 on Cabarrus St. in downtown Raleigh, although the center is still shopping around for a larger, permanent location. I was fortunate enough to sit down with Bobby Hilburn, executive director, and discuss the center.

As in previous Q&As, we’ve broken this post into two parts: today, Bobby will talk about his history and career path and what it means to come out in the South. Tomorrow, we’ll talk about the LGBT Center and its grand opening. 

Erin: Bobby, thanks so much for spending some time with me and OutFront! I’d like to start by mentioning that you recently quit your very lucrative job as a financial planner to take on the executive director role full-time. That’s quite a decision – I’d love to hear more about it.

Bobby: Ha, yes. I recently left my practice to become the interim executive director for the LGBT Center of Raleigh (LGBTCOR). I’m from southeastern North Carolina, one of the more conservative parts of the state, and was raised in a very traditional, conservative family.

After leaving home to attend the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, I worked abroad and traveled quite a bit before finding myself back in Raleigh. As a financial planner, I worked with many members of the LGBT community, and as a way to give back, I wanted to become more involved in ongoing efforts to create a stronger, more unified LGBT “group.”

The more involved I became in LGBT affairs in the area, the more I realized that Raleigh NEEDED an LGBT community center. I quickly discovered that this was more than a weekend activity, that it had become my passion. For me, there was no question about it – I had to take on this new challenge in order to continue building support to create and maintain a successful center. 

Erin: Being a North Carolina native, why is this center important for Raleigh, and the South, in general?

Bobby: Being gay or lesbian or bi or transgender puts you in a minority, particularly in a small Southern city like Raleigh. People act differently when minorities are not visible – they’re much more likely to discriminate the idea of something rather than the reality of something. Having an LGBT community center in Raleigh will bring much needed visibility to our community and the South, both socially and politically.

Raleigh, and the Triangle (Raleigh, Durham and Chapel Hill) have large LGBT populations, yet we’re JUST opening our first community center for LGBTs. We must not self-segregate as a community and we cannot remain under the radar to policy makers. It is vital that the LGBT community, all ages, races, ethnicities, religions, have a fixed location available to them as a place of support and celebration. It is equally important to use that we are seen by those not directly involved with the LGBT community – both allies and non-allies. I strongly believe that the center will increase our visibility and establish our presence in this city, driving support and ultimately, equality.

Erin: What does it mean to be out in the South, a traditionally socially conservative area?

Bobby: Let me tell you, it isn’t easy for many people to be out in the traditional South. It often means being ridiculed, bullied and often, ostracized simply for being gay. Let’s face it, even with recent triumphs for the LGBT community – we have a long way to go as a society. Even in progressive areas, many gay, lesbian, bi and transgendered people are still scared to be open about their sexuality, orientation or gender identity. Little by little, we’re hoping to change that  – first, we’ll open a center for LGBT citizens, and then we’ll continue to support Raleigh’s “coming out” with education and awareness campaigns.

Come back tomorrow for the second part of our Q&A with Bobby Hilburn of the LGBT Center of Raleigh.

(Photo courtesy of the LGBT Center of Raleigh)